Thursday, October 12, 2017

Things To Do in Less Daylight

As daylight shortens and nights grow long:
  • watch and laugh at YouTube videos of parrots taught to swear
  • buy something on eBay or Amazon every day before getting out of bed in the morning
  • stave off morning coffee to extend the small pleasure of looking forward to it
  • tap "Like" on every Facebook post
  • stay up until 3:00 a.m. mending all the torn clothes and altering all the too-long sleeves piled up during the last five months 
  • buy and eat Hershey bars
  • buy and eat Hostess Snowballs
  • procrastinate if there's any work to do
  • scroll through hundreds of the latest memes 
  • scroll through hundreds of before-and-after photos of plastic surgery
  • attend fall festivals for 20 minutes and then go home
  • drink

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